I am a veteran who had 20 years in the Air Force. Through the VA I am 100 percent temporary disabled. I was able to get my Fibromyalgia rated last year. Also, I asked for an increase in my depression which they did. It was not an easy process but I was thankful I was approved. I want to guide other Veterans through the disability process.
Recently I was turned down for social security disability insurance (SSDI). I fought them for two years. Going before two different judges – bared my soul for them. Just received my last denial last Friday. It put me in a spiral out of control anger and depression. Tried to put a bright face on for everyone but exhausting. Suicidal thoughts raging. Telling me to just give up. Truly exhausting! So ugly it’s hard to figure out how to get from one day to the next.
My friend told me to start a blog. I thought ‘OK, but what do I have to say? I don’t know….have to really think about it. Things that are important to me. My relationship with Jesus, saving money and veterans. This will be the start of my blog.
Yesterday one of my small town members committed suicide. This really make’s me think this is one topic I need to speak about. Neighbors heard gunshots so they called the police. They had to bring in everyone – police, fire and numerous other teams. They spent over 6 hours trying to talk to this gentleman with no success. It ended with the man taking his life. So sad! This could have been me on Saturday. I struggle everyday with suicidal thoughts but I have been taught how to get through them. I really wish someone had been able to get through to this 61 year old man.